Strength in the Struggle

16 Jan


     Subconsciously I stare at my nakedness in the mirror, reluctantly preparing to go to, yet, another boring conference. “Sometimes – I don’t know why I bother”, are thoughts I ponder. I have already anticipated this being the Worst event – because, as always, I am the only faithful one who fills in- when the “paid” deems this job is beneath them.

     This is definitely not how I imagine my life to be at 30. People often compliment me; telling me how I am so smart, and beautiful. And I wonder are they pitying me or just simply blind. Surely they see these scars!

I have attempted reconstructive surgeries with very little success. Sometimes if the light shines just right I can still see the discoloration of my neck and bruised arms. Not one brand of makeup has been effective in shielding.

How can I truthfully continue to bring awareness to these women if I’m still hurt about what happened!

I make a pretty decent living for myself and son- so the lack of pay doesn’t bother me much. What has me so torn-is the chain of events that have occurred and the stories I’ve heard and the secrets I’ve been keeping. I’m screaming on the inside but no one hears!

My present being is at a stand still, as I try hard to remember to forget. I begin reiterating statements of validation in an effort to manage to put one foot in front of the next- and face my demons.

I will never forget the brightness of faces staring back at me- as 200 women- who’s possibly experienced similar anguish- applauded my entrance.

I am an event planner by trade and also serve as a Motivational Speaker for one of the most demanding, prominent cities in the United States. I have successfully facilitated a few events- raising awareness to mental and sexual abuse among family members.

My expertise goes beyond my Masters in Human Psychology. Nonetheless, I still have feelings of inadequacy because most of the women are Very Professional and of Wealthy Stature………..And mainly fear of judgement.

WELLP’……Here Goes….Screenshot_2017-06-26-17-50-55-1.png

4 Responses to “Strength in the Struggle”

  1. Nina J January 16, 2015 at 7:24 pm #

    Umm where’s the rest of this book? This was really well written and kept my interest . I’m so proud of you Lady!

    • sunnykelley January 17, 2015 at 1:18 am #

      Thankyou Love.. you know there is More!

  2. Glenys Clarice (The Fab Side of Life) January 21, 2015 at 7:17 pm #

    Love this! Go Sunny!

    • sunnykelley January 21, 2015 at 7:39 pm #

      Thankyou Suga.. Very Encouraging

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